Sittin On A Porch

Sittin On A Porch
Our little back porch

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Another day in August

It has been one of those days.  One of those days where I made few accomplishments.  I had goals, but by the time I got up it was already hot and well, I just didn't feel up to doing anything.  Sometimes I wonder if I am bipolar.  I seem to have the happiest of times, and then I seem to be lonely sad and depressed.  No middle.  Today was one of those days where I was lonely.  And it is not like I want someone here, I just would like to have someone to call up and have that special connection.  So I did something that is not me.  I signed up for a senior dating service.  I am not really interested in a relationship, because, well, maybe I have one.  I am not sure.  But I am monogamous even in my imaginary life.  

Anyway, I thought maybe if having someone flirt a little bit might make me feel a little better.  No, it did not.  I had boys send a flirt.  That is what they do, they send flirts.  I thought that might be fun.  No, having boys in their 30s and 40s sending me a "Thought you could use a flirt"  What does that mean?  Am I such an old pathetic looking woman, that they guys thought I would crazy because they flirted with me?  Ok, there is someone who when they flirt with me makes my heart flutter, but he is busy.  His life is full and long hours and hard work.  And for the most part I understand that, but sometimes I still could use a little attention.  Can't we all.  

Of course I understand that part of this is meds, and part of it is still feeling a little lost as I figure out my new life.  

So what about this computer dating thing?  I don't know.  So far it really doesn't seem to fit me, but maybe I will learn a little bit about dating the world.  Maybe not, I have never been very smart about dating or relationships.  Well, it has been interesting.  It did not build my confidence.  It did not make me feel better about myself.  

Well, sometimes life has happy days, and other days are not.  But that is OK.  I tried to make a difference in my mood, and it was a different day.  


  1. I love your new header. If Edna Rose wore pajamas, she would outgrow them every night.
    I am proud of you and enjoyed sharing some giggles today. Love you...M

  2. I think that each of us wants love, and sometimes that means a companion, a person who we can share our life with. I am glad that you are courageous about seeing what the dating thing is about. I don't know that I would do that. Probably, I would just be a hermit in the woods.